- ISBN13: 9780451215222
- Condition: NEW
- Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.
Product Description
What to say-and what not to say-when a friend or family member has an eating disorder.
When a friend or family member shows signs of an eating disorder, the first impulse is to charge in, give advice, and fix what is wrong. But these tactics-however well-intentioned-can backfire.
This compassionate guide offers ways to tackle the tough topics of body image, media messages, physical touch, diets, and exercise-along with a special section on talk… More >>
Talking to Eating Disorders: Simple Ways to Support Someone With Anorexia, Bulimia, Binge Eating, Or BodyImage Issues
Heaton and Strauss have written a book on a very complex topic – eating disorders – and have done a good job in breaking things down so that a caregiver or anyone who is concerened can help through practical means – in conversation, actions, etc… I felt that they provided some very good suggestions as to specific words that are helpful, and words that don’t encourage.
I bought this book, as my mid-twenty year old girlfriend has anorexia. Unfortunately, I found that while good information was presented, it was very basic. For example, the first chapter talks about blame and how blaming others can complicate a situation. While this is true, I didn’t need to be reminded of this simple fact.
There is no fluff in this book what-so-ever. It is simply filled with tons of suggestions of things to say or not to say, along with a description for each comment. I found it frustratingly simple, with, as I’ve said before, many topics that felt like common sense. I feel that this book, however, would be a fantastic resource for younger friends of a person with an ED, maybe for the middle school and early highschool years.
On average, I read about half the book within about a 3-day time period, and skimmed the rest.
Chapters include topics on:
Blame, understanding change, being in control of what you can and should be in control of, conversation basics, talking about body image, talking about messages from the media, talking about touch (for romantic relationships), talking about diet, talking about exercise, talking about professional help, talking to young people, managing emergencies, handling relapses, and a “dos and don’ts” chapter.
Each chapter is short, and, as I said before, have many of the “comments” in bold, with an explaination.
For me, this wasn’t helpful, although it did affirm a lot that I already knew or felt. I will be searching for a more exhaustive resource, probably this time, one specifically on anorexia.
Rating: 3 / 5
I found this book as a second try and I’m glad I did! When I had the need for a book on this subject I checked one out of the public library in my hometown. It was so bad I returned it after reading about half. I found this one on Amazon and ordered it without reviews but I’m happy I took a chance.
The focus of the book is on talking, communication and understanding. How to be the best support for a person you love. It empathetically explains what you can expect to help out with and kindly lets you know when to hold back or have patience and realize that you cannot control what someone else eats.
That said there is a lot that you can do to be supportive and encouraging. I have read each section and found myself better understanding what the person suffering from the eating disorder is actually thinking. How they are processing what we are saying, for good or bad. I realized that this is one disorder where it is so easy to try your best to be supportive but fail because your words are inadvertently hurtful or misunderstood.
What I also loved about this book was the lack of filler. It does not spend pages quoting side effects, endless paragraphs of examples that take up space or chapters dedicated to rehash. They wrote a book that filled a need and not to make money on a “hot” topic. It also lets you in on the fact that with an eating disorders there is no easy cure. Many of the books I looked at seemed to hint that if you followed this or that program you’d have this problem crossed off your list, and fast.
The author explains the long term situation, the 3 steps forward 2 steps back path that this disorder usually takes. I appreciated knowing that it might be a long road and not to expect miracles. I learned how to listen, so I’d know when to bring up certain subjects to get the ball rolling again or for the fist time.
Very insightful and informative.
Thank you Ms. Heaton and Ms. Strauss
Rating: 5 / 5