Life Behind the Smiles – My Eating Disorder in Pictures


*TRIGGERING*This is just a video i made using pictures from the last couple of years. It was hard for me to post these pictures, because looking at them disgusts me. I hope that seeing what i go through, either helps you understand a little more about the reality of eating disorders, or makes you take another look at your own life. This life, it’s real, sometimes it dosn’t feel like it, sometimes it feels like a bad dream, but in reality, what we are dealing with is life and death, and only we can make that decision for ourselves. I don’t own the song, it is Angel By Sarah Mclachlan

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25 Responses to “Life Behind the Smiles – My Eating Disorder in Pictures”

  1. flawedinsomniac Says:

    You are beautiful.

  2. rescuelullaby Says:

    @brambleface
    Im touched that this video affected you so much, and sorry to hear about your dad, its no fun being accused of things (especially when they aren’t true and are as serious as having an ED). Hope you are taking care xoxo

  3. brambleface Says:

    i could barely even finish watching it i’m crying right now :[ my dad always accused me of having an eating disorder wehn i don't and i'm honestly not that bad and i could be if i wanted to but yeah nyways... good video :]

  4. rescuelullaby Says:

    @todreamisagift
    Thank You. Just Thank You.
    Your support means everything
    xoxo

  5. todreamisagift Says:

    i just watched it again… it brings tears to my eyes… be strong, count on me always… love you little angel!!!
    xoxo
    Fran

  6. taperjeanngirl Says:

    Michelle, I love this video. You did a great job, perfect song to go with your life story. (one of my favs) I know “loving” this video may seem weird, since it is about your eating disorder and how hard of a struggle it is. But you brave, kind and silly. Remember you have youtube’s support, as well as mine :)

  7. TheseEmeraldEyes Says:

    Such a moving video and perfect music to match. Stay Strong
    Cat x

  8. lilmover Says:

    Very good video i thought, i just wanted to jump through the screen and give you a huge warm fuzzy understanding cuddle. hope your okay lovely xxxx

  9. Javacrazy7777 Says:

    Hi there! I happened to come across you chanel for the “Bio-oil updates” and noticed some of your music. You might like songs by Skillet, Barlow Girl, and Kutless. Thank you for the review!

  10. Kathrynmovies Says:

    This song is really good, I like it we play it where I work, keep strong <3

  11. AnnaKaty7 Says:

    You’ve done this really powerfully and well. It’s amazing. And yes, you are so brave for posting this. I could never ever do anything like that.

  12. edhelp300 Says:

    It’s a endless battle at times… I remind myself when I wake-up that today is new and I must keep trying to love myself not matter what ED keeps telling me… I do understand girl… I have been going through this for years… great video… i’ sorry that this is in your life but glad you are getting the word out there that it more that what many think it is!!! thanks so much!!

  13. rescuelullaby Says:

    @MyThunder8
    Thank you

  14. rescuelullaby Says:

    @hollowriver
    It is hard, and it’s a struggle, it’s a fight, but it’s a fight worth fighting. We just have to take it one day at a time, and try not to let it get the better of us. Take care sweet. xoxo

  15. rescuelullaby Says:

    @AnnaHasNoMiddleName
    Thank you for your kind comment, hang on in there hun xoxo

  16. rescuelullaby Says:

    @jelly0belly
    Thank you, you made me smile. Stay strong hun xoxo

  17. AnnaHasNoMiddleName Says:

    This was really sad; I’ve had anorexia for 3 years and been at a healthy weight for a year so I know it’s not about the weight at all. But you are beautiful.

  18. jelly0belly Says:

    you have very pretty hair and a nice smile :D take care of yourself

  19. hollowriver Says:

    I hate how one moment my eating disorder surrenders me hopeless and I’m crying on the floor wishing I’d change me ways or just be someone else then another day I convince my self if I’m thinner i’d be happier i’ll finally get ware I want i’ll have control over this battle that I will not have to give up my ed to be happy and heathy. I’m still waiting for the day calories don’t go through my head. I wish you the same. you are beautiful.

  20. MyThunder8 Says:

    It breaks my heart to see this. You can beat this, I have faith.

  21. philldadrill1 Says:

    I used to have an eating disorder as well. You truly are an inspiration to a lot of people, don’t ever give up, no matter what. I know how hard it is and how you feel, but you’re gorgeous no matter what, inside and out. It’s 2010 and I hope you can find some amazing happiness! You deserve it!

  22. rescuelullaby Says:

    Kirsty, I’m glad that this video reached you in some way, and although i wouldn’t wish this upon anyone, for me, and hopefully you too, it helps to know we aren’t alone in this struggle. I understand what you mean about finding the courage to upload videos, it took me a while too, just do it when it feels right for you. Hold your head up girl, because we both deserve to get through this~Michelle

  23. rescuelullaby Says:

    Thank you so much for watching and for your kind words, hang on in there sweetie xoxo

  24. rescuelullaby Says:

    Thank you darling, life is a decision that i’m trying to make more regularly, as it really is the only option. As a subscriber of yours i’d just like to say how much your videos have helped, and been an inspiration to me. Hope you are taking care. xoxo

  25. LanaLiger Says:

    Your welcome. I know you can beat this.

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